Further Reading

Linear liner notes

Brexit talks are in the endgame, but is that just the talks or the deal or anything and what’s the game? Is it Risk or Trivial Pursuit? Brexit Fallout returns, plus Tiernan (@tiernandouieb) looks at what the Taxpayers’ Alliance is, and loads of US politics as Georg Löfflmann (@gloefflmann) explains the mid term elections and the consequences of populism.

Links and sources of info from Georg’s interview:

• • Georg Löfflmann on Twitter – https://twitter.com/gloefflmann
• • The Washington Post on Twitter – https://twitter.com/washingtonpost
• • The New York Times on Twitter – https://twitter.com/nytimes
• • Vox on Twitter – https://twitter.com/voxdotcom
• • Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis, by J. D. Vance (book) – http://amzn.eu/d/bAJAjGD

All the usual ParPolBro stuff:

• • Twitter – twitter.com/ParPolBro and twitter.com/TiernanDouieb   
• • Facebook – www.facebook.com/groups/ParPolBro 
• • Website – www.tiernandouieb.co.uk/podcast
• • Donate to the Patreon – www.patreon.com/parpolbro
• • Buy me a coffee – ko-fi.com/parpolbro
• • Review the show on iTunes – itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/partly-political-broadcast/id1075342863?mt=2 
• • Review the show on Stitcher – www.stitcher.com/podcast/partly-political-broadcast
• • The Last Skeptik – www.thelastskeptik.com

Transcript

Episode 120

Hello and welcome to the Partly Political Broadcast, the podcast that laughs in the face of politics only for politics to laugh with it, causing me to say no wait, we were definitely laughing at you. This is episode 120, I’m Tiernan Douieb and this week as US President and sea pork with eyes Donald Trump missed an Armistice ceremony at a US cemetery in France due to poor weather, I wonder if Secret Service heard someone say it was pissing it down and got concerned it could lead to a compromising video.

It’s been quite a week for Trumpy features, and yes you could say that every single week of his presidency. It started with some very varied results at the mid-term elections, proving that America is still not so much United States but more 50 dysfunctional ones clumped together in a disparate heap like a frighteningly powerful teenagers’ bedroom. In a sign of progress, the Democrats gained enough seats to get a majority in the House of Congress, with a number of those being first time candidates and two of them being the first ever Muslim women elected to Congress which almost makes me believe in karma. The only way it’d feel sweeter is if they were also constantly kneeling at the time, had part time jobs at CNN and owned pet sharks. But for the sort of balance you get when you have an aged tangerine dinosaur clamping down a foot on your see saw, the Republicans gained a majority in the Senate, due to, for example, a majority of white men and women in Texas still voting for discarded husk Ted Cruz. Though to be fair this could be because they’ve had the story passed down the generations that if they don’t do that, he’d fly around at night and eat their children. Voters in Nevada managed to elect a Republican candidate who had actually died two weeks earlier, which the party should take note of for 2020. If they make sure all their candidates are dead on the inside and outside by the general election, they’ll definitely win. Definitely. But despite the mixed bag, Donald declared the midterms a tremendous success, in the way someone who’s had several businesses that have all gone bankrupt deems success. I’m pretty sure it’s also because while the Democrats have taken the House, Trump thinks it doesn’t matter as he knows he has several other properties he can move into if needs be.

At the post-election news conference, Trump berated Republican candidates who didn’t accept his embrace, not that he usually waits for consent on that sort of thing and proposed both Democrats and Republicans work together on issues they both want to do something about. You know like healthcare, where they both want to do completely different things with it. I get the feeling Trump would solve the fox, hen, grain in a boat problem by putting all three in at once and just waiting to see who survives, while he eats a burger. Trump had CNN White House correspondent Jim Acosta’s press access revoked after an altercation during the news conference that mainly involved Acosta asking questions like he should and Trump, er, Acosta-ing him. Website for people who simultaneously want to have their own shadow deported and have sex with it, Infowars, doctored footage of Acosta asking questions, so it looks like he assaults the female staff member who took the microphone off him, which the White House tweeted and then revoked his access as a result. Unexpected stance for Trump as I’d have thought seeing Acosta shout over a woman before aggressively touching her would mean he’d be hired by the President for a cabinet role immediately. Later that same day, it was announced that face swap between an apple pie and a corpse, Jeff Sessions was forced by Trump to resign as Attorney General, with Matthew Whittaker taking his place. Now aside from Whittaker looking a lot like an angry penis in a suit, he was also part of a firm who scammed veterans out of their savings and has also previously written a piece for CNN called ‘Mueller’s investigation is going too far’ and the Democrats are now asking he recuse himself from overseeing it. But wait, didn’t Trump say CNN was fake news, so maybe Whittaker loves Mueller and this is his way of conning the President. Oh no wait, sorry, he only scams those who’ve served their country.

Then over the weekend Trump was in Paris for the 100-year anniversary of Armistice Day, where world leaders gathered to remember those who gave their lives for their countries in the way that you were forced to do when conscription existed. French President and den chief Emmanuel Macron spoke out against nationalism commenting that it stamps out a nation’s moral values. So, if anything, he probably just promoted it to Trump. On the Sunday a topless protestor ran out in front of Trump’s motorcade with ‘fake peace’ written on her chest. A perfect attack on both his aggressive policies and also proving the weather really wasn’t that bad as she didn’t even need a t-shirt.

Meanwhile back in Blighty, ministers are aiming to have a Brexit plan within 48 hours, in much the same way they’ve been aiming to have one for the past two years, just quicker. By plan, they mean the bit for just after we leave and then an outline on what to do next, in the way that when I say I’ve been working on a script, I’ve mainly just spent 4 hours writing the title and putting it in different fonts. This lack of preparation was explained last week when Brexit Secretary and morph suit Dominic Raab told a tech conference that he hadn’t quite understood how reliant the UK is on the Dover-Calais crossing and that our country is a peculiar, frankly, geographic, economic entity. No wonder all of this is taking so long if the head of the department for exiting the European union has only just realized basic geography. If you’d never been outside, forgotten to read anything and assumed the UK was the Pangea of the planet with the EU just some dinghy bobbing off the coast like a floater on a string, then of course you’d think we should just get what we want out of a deal or threatening to blow in one direction really hard till they all sink. Is the problem with all of the government? Should we see if we can delay the Brexit process by a few years so we can quickly send out leaflets explaining that the Earth travels around the sun, you can’t drink water from the top lip of a cup and that dogs aren’t just small horses? Oh wow, I can’t wait to see Raab’s face when someone lets him know that the Eurostar goes underneath the water. More and more I feel like politics right now is the big scale equivalent of when you’re a kid and you realise that actually your parents are also idiots, just bigger idiots. And when you have those bigger idiots working for you, who needs any other support, am I right? Which is why I’m sure Prime Minister and statue to remember those who won’t fall despite all the hints Theresa May is fine with the DUP, aka the party for people who write labels on food in the fridge, that they won’t support any plan that includes a customs border in the Irish Sea. This came after Whitehall leaked notes about the PM’s plan to sell Brexit to skeptical ministers that include May telling the CBI Conference on November 19^th that she has delivered the referendum. Not the result, just a bit of paper with the questions on probably. A government spokesperson said the misspelling and childish language in the document should make it clear its not the government’s thinking. What? The only thing that could make it more definitely real was if it was written in comic sans with crayon drawn examples. This meant several politicians including Environment Secretary and beestung nipple Michael Gove demanded to see May’s full legal advice on how to avoid a border in Northern Ireland because its best to let complete non-experts have a look. And now as a result, its a real shame the DUP are now getting pissy about the possibility of a border in the Irish Sea because I think it sounds great. Imagine! All fish to have passports, goods checks done by crabs in little hats, RyanAir to have to swap planes for small wooden rafts, and Disgraced MP Liam the Disgrace Fox to have to swim to all of his meetings. As if the DUP’s constant disapproval as though they live in a country the government seem to entirely forget about or something, as if that isn’t enough to add to the constant feeling of rats leaving a ship that sunk years ago and then was discovered and then left at the bottom of the ocean because it’s really not worth it, Transport minister and face drawn on Boris Johnson’s left leg Jo Johnson, resigned from the cabinet in protest about Brexit. Unlike his brother, Johnson the Younger thinks the current state of Brexit is Britain’s biggest crisis since the Second World War. A scary thought, especially as it may mean future US presidents will completely ignore us if it rains. Other Remain backing MPs such as bird in disguise as a man Dominic Grieve and every smile hurts Justine Greening have said that more ministers are planning to resign and Remainers will work together to defeat May’s deal in parliament as there has been a sea change. Well of course, as they have to prep to put a border in it.

Over in opposition town Labour leader and animated tea towel Jeremy Corbyn was criticized for wearing an anorak to Remembrance Day memorials which is what happens to him every year and I can’t defend a man who hasn’t yet realized he should turn up in a full sized poppy costume and waft opiates at people while singing ‘We’ll meet again’. But aside from that silly cover rage, in an interview with German magazine Die Speigel, Corbyn said ‘We can’t stop Brexit’ like an old man who warns you of a monster in the first 5 minutes of a film before dying horribly, and then an hour later it turns out you just need a high pitched noise or a cold or something. In a later interview with Channel 4 news, Corbyn also said a second Brexit vote isn’t needed as its time to bring people together. Sure, and how will you do that instead then Jezza? A ton of superglue? A cleverly planned Tinder con? Because as it is, his own party still can’t work on one single message, with Shadow Brexit Secretary and what if they redesigned Gordon Ramsey using a ruler Keir Starmer, completely contradicted Corbyn and said Brexit can be stopped. Now either the Labour party has the communication skills of Vodafone at a music festival, or this is all some clever tactic so that people who want Brexit to happen will vote for Corbyn’s Labour party and people who don’t can vote for Starmer’s Labour party or more likely everyone will get fed up and wish everyone was dead. I’m hoping the party just embrace it and change their slogan to either ‘Labour: Keep ‘em guessing’, ‘The Party Line is made of silly string’ or perhaps ‘For the many views, not the one coherent one’. Hmm, not so catchy.

And lastly, Culture Secretary and man made entirely of fly paper Jeremy Wright says he plays with Lego to relax. That explains his ideas about funding the arts are all very small scale. He has recently built a recreation of the Death Star from 4500 bricks which now means he can take an active part in helping Theresa May build her own. And supermarket chain Iceland has had their Christmas advert highlighting the destruction of the rainforest rejected for television broadcast on account of being too political. This is possibly because the officiating body Clearcast saw it had a cartoon orangutan in it and worried it may harm UK-US relations. Still, they are going to be really angry when they see this year’s John Lewis advert is all about a lonely Prime Minister who asks Santa for any idea for a Brexit deal and gets visited by a man with a beard and an anorak who just tells her ‘no’ and then cycles off.

ADMIN

Howdy pod receptacles, how are you this week? Did you do all Remembrance day things? I’m not sure what sort of stuff that would be. I mean I wore a poppy but that is mostly just annual way of highlighting how much I love heroin. I did watch They Shall Not Grow Old which was the moving film of World War 1 footage that they’d coloured in so it looked real. I mean, it was real. I think. Peter Jackson directed it and I don’t think he CGI’d in some extra bits but he’s a sneaky bugger isn’t he? I bet there were some unnecessary flying eagles in there somewhere. I was also very pleased he didn’t give World War 1 five extra unneeded endings that went on longer than the year they waiting till the Treaty Of Versailles. But yes, it was very upsetting at times and pretty amazing anyone survived those horrors but also from a totally vacuous point of view, I was amazed at how much something being in colour meant it felt real. I guess I just thought that if maybe Philip Hammond used some blusher, I might pay attention to him. ARF!

Right, enough of that silliness. I won’t lie, there’s a lot going on isn’t there? I mean, not that I regularly lie about what’s happening, this isn’t the goddamn fake news, just the real news told badly and with swears in. Not fox news but fucks news. Does that work? It doesn’t does it, and it sounds like some really awful porn parody news channel featuring only white blonde people. I’ll stop that now. But yes, this was one of those week’s where by Thursday I was thinking ‘hooray the podcast will be easy to write’ and by Sunday I was thinking ‘oh no’ and considering just not watching the news and spending today hiding in a cupboard. Then I realized how full our cupboards are and had to face the newsic. But it’s ok because here we are with this 192 hour podcast and hopefully I’ve crammed in only the good bits like a, er, Nakd bar of a podcast as opposed to a, erm, a turd. If you are one of the many listeners who hears this show outside of the UK, Nakd bars are these healthy snacks that some how taste of things like blueberry muffins or bakewell tarts despite being all squished fruit and it doesn’t make sense but what I do is try to eat them so I don’t eat actual blueberry muffins or bakewell tarts and instead I eat them and they are so moorish I then still have to have the real version after and become double unhealthy. Hooray for healthy snacks!

That’s my nakd confessions for this week. And actually there’s not much else to say in this bit. I mean yeah review yadda yadda yadda, donate all your money to me on the Patreon or ko-fi sites and spend the rest of your life walking the earth barefoot in search of justice yadda yadda yadda and get one of those massive airfield speakers and pop it outside your house and tell everyone to subscribe. Of course I could say play this podcast but then that wouldn’t get me the extra listens, I’m no fool. So all that but apart from the usual, this week I would also like to plug a podcast called Silent Mark Tries His Best as the excellent comedian and radio host Silent Mark who’s name is in the title and everything interviewed me this week and I talked for ages about all sorts of shit, so if that sounds good, and I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I’ve sold it, check that out. Also my brother who I always thank at the end of this show because all the music for this podcast is his handy work, has started his podcast Thanks For Trying back up again. So far guests have been really good people like Romesh Ranganathan, Ed Skrein and various excellent rappers, comedians and interesting types and then he gets them all drunk and they chat. It is very good. Give that a go. And what I’ve been told by podcast legends is that the best way to get new listeners for your podcast, as in, as well as the ones already listening, I don’t want to replace you heros, god no, but what I should do is guest on other podcasts, as apparently the only people who listen to podcasts are people who listen to podcasts. WHICH MAKES NO SENSE! I mean how did the first podcast listeners find out about it? Cray. But if you have another favourite podcast that you think my stupid voice could make an appearance on, please ask them to book me in. Fan pressure is the best pressure and if James Dyson wasn’t such a bellend I’d sell him that as a new catchphrase but I won’t because I have principles.

On this week’s show, as you know I usually refrain from US politics stuff because there’s so many good US politics comedy shows and podcasts out there. But with the midterms I thought it was time for a catch up on the exploits of the land of the free until point of purchase, so I interviewed expert in international security and American politics from Warwick University Georg Lofflman all about the elections and populism. Plus sadly Brexit Fallout returns because there’s still a constant lack of progress to tell you about or if you like, you could skip that bit and yell into a wall for 15 minutes for the same effect. Yes wall not well. A well would at least pretend to give something back. But before that, try some of this. Go on try it. Just a little bit, go on:

TAXPAYERS ALLIANCE

An inaptronym is when someone’s name is the opposite of what they are like. For example, when my wife was in labor, the midwife we had was called Joy and she was really always constantly angry. Or how Paul Young isn’t. Or how my surname is Douieb and yet I’ve definitely never done yeb. Whatever that is. Similarly, the right wing think tank Taxpayer’s Alliance is a perfect inaptronym because well, firstly they openly state that they are a right wing think tank who campaign for a low tax society because they believe funding services with tax undermines the British economy. And because for years, their former director was Alexander Heath, lived in a farmhouse in France and didn’t pay any tax at all. You might have seen the Taxpayers Alliance on many of your least favourite political programs over the last several years, someone like Chloe Westley who looks like someone super imposed a child’s face onto a cartoon drawing of a lion, always popping up on Question Time to add to the noise of people pointlessly yelling at each other, or on many of the panels on Marr or Daily Politics or many of the others, with little introduction other than they are from the TPA and that’s that. But in the past week their name has popped up in the news because of Shahmir Sanni, the 24 year old who whistleblew on the Vote Leave campaign’s huge overspending back in March. As retaliation for doing so, Stephen Parkinson who was the national organizer for Vote Leave issued a statement that Sanni was in a relationship with him, saying that he understood if the lines had become blurred, and outing Sanni to the world. This was particularly dangerous because of Sanni’s family in Pakistan where people are killed for being homosexual. Sanni was working for the Taxpayers Alliance when he revealed the Vote Leave overspend and they sacked him within days, despite Whistleblowers being protected by British law under the Public Interest Disclosure Act, before their founder Matthew Elliott, a man who looks a lot like the sort of person who’d befriend Jude Law, kill him and then take his identity, appeared on the BBC to call Sanni a liar and a fantasist. So Sanni sued the TPA and since that happened, the Electoral Commission’s investigation found that he was correct and Vote Leave did illegally overspend during the campaign and the TPA have not contested Sanni’s claim.

But who are they and who are they funded by? Well for starters they are a business. Their own annual report says the name Taxpayers’ Alliance is the trading name of Taxpayers Alliance Ltd, which seperates them from other think tanks because they don’t elect a leader or have a board of trustees. They only have 18 members listed on their website, all whiter than a colour chart for tip-ex and they have an advisory council, including various right wing journalists, economists and directors or heads of other right wing think tanks. There is the chairman Andrew Allum and the CEO John O’Connell who are listed on companies house as in control of the business meaning its essentially a private company. If anything, everytime one of them appear on the BBC, one of the presenters should be forced to follow every one of their sentences by saying ‘other opinions are available.’

Many of the members were active in the Conservative party with Chairman Allum being a Tory councilor in Westminster and then leaving because apparently the party wasn’t free market and individualist anymore. I mean, if you want somewhere that does both those things more than the Tories, you’re probably best setting up your own dark world inside The Sims. Other members include a former advisor to Michael Gove, so they obviously aren’t an expert in their field or he wouldn’t have listened, and a Tory campaigner that helped run the Margaret Thatcher Centre at Buckingham University which I guess is the exact opposite of a community centre. So the Conservative connections are obvious and perhaps unsurprising, but their donor list is pretty secret. In the past its been revealed that Sir Anthony Bamford donates to them and he is the tycoon that owns JCB, so I guess his dad’s Bruce Lee. They are given free offices in Westminster by property multimillionaire David Alberto and various businesses grouped as the Midlands Industrial Council who said back in 2009 that they donated because they couldn’t get any of their concerns heard about tax money being wasted but they donated to the Taxpayers Alliance who brought it up in their constant and extensive media coverage and it ended up on parties agendas.

When he was chairman, Matthew Elliot denied that the TPA were a Conservative front organization. But with backing from secret donors, the few who’ve been revealed also donating to the Conservatives, and who use their donations to lobby policies, and with links to other right wing think tanks and the Vote Leave movement it doesn’t seem like he was telling the truth. Especially when all these groups got together to slur Shahmir Sanni when he spoke the truth about them and were given a platform to do so openly by major news networks. It really does raise questions about if we’re being told everything about the guests we see on these shows. Especially when their line is super hard Brexit to the extent they are willing to back law breaking to get it, that the NHS should get less money, less tax should be spent on public services and there should be less welfare. So if there’s a Conservative Brexiteer on a Question Time panel and a member of the taxpayers alliance too, then for balance the BBC should have two Remain Labour MPs, or you know several people who actually pay tax. Or at least just introduce them as a ‘An organization that doesn’t want to pay tax, is funded by some shady donors, back illegal spending and is run by two blokes who don’t like poor people and look like stock pictures of men who’ve tried to force themselves on their cleaner.’

INTERVIEW – Georg Lofflemann

What I like about US politics is every time I think things in the UK are bad I can look over there for a weekly hit of schadenfreude. I mean we have Brexit, they have pointless gun violence. We have racism and xenophobia, they have it too but with extra pointless gun violence. We have a blindly confident leader who is driving the country to disaster, and the US have the same, but worse because theirs can’t even talk like a grown up, and they also have pointless gun violence. But last week the US mid-term elections happen, you know, the ones between the big ones. The ones that no one outside of the US has ever paid attention to before because we don’t really understand how it all works. You know the one that last time meant Obama couldn’t do anything for ages because loads of Republicans got in and then blocked everything he did but none of it mattered if you live abroad because he seemed so cool when he said things. But now, now we’re all paying attention because suddenly as America hurtles ever more closely towards a Cormac McCarthy novel and no, not the long one about the horses, and yes, it is already a lot like a country for old men and no one else, yes ok I meant The Road stop it literary nerds. As America heads towards something Viggo Mortenson would have to walk around angrily in, all eyes turned to the US to see if the Democrats might make any sort of comeback that could mean in the future the country could go back to having a leader that still bombs other countries but at least has a nice smile while doing it. And as the Democrats took the House of Representatives it showed that there is a retaliation against Trump’s presidency, but also as Republicans took the Senate, it’s not as much of one as anyone who understood that Get Out was a horror movie and not a how to guide wanted.

So, what do these results mean, what does Trump and other populists popularity mean, and seriously, how did a dead person win in Nevada? Oh no wait, I’ve just checked our House of Lords for comparison. It makes sense now. To answer the first two questions and more, I spoke to Georg Lofflmann who is a research fellow on International Security and US politics at Warwick University. Georg has previously written a book called American Grand Strategy under Obama, on how the Obama doctrine challenged the consensus of American exceptionalism and he is now working on a project called The Enemy Inside The Gates: Anti-Elite Hostility and the Political Agency of the Everyday in Europe and the USA all abouyt contemporary populism. So he seemed like the perfect person to translate the results and their possible aftermath into language us British types could understand.

Oh before we start a very quick:

EXCUSES EXCUSES

Ok so don’t worry, this all sounds ok apart from a few clunks and paper rustles here and there because Georg very kindly prepped and had notes, so you know, a few clunks for better answers, I’ll take that thanks Bob. But I wanted to tell you that for some reason the recording, when I saved it, sped up my voice so it sounded like Georg was being interviewed by a chipmunk. So, it doesn’t sound like that now, but I’ll pop a clip of it at the very end of the episode because, let’s face it, it’s hilarious.

Anyway, hope you enjoy or whatever the feeling’s called when you get informed and feel a bit scared. Here’s Georg:

INTERVIEW WITH GEORG PART 1

And we’ll be back with Georg in a minute but first…

BREXIT FALLOUT

By the time you hear this, if you’re listening later in the week, the government may have agreed on the terms of the UK’s Brexit exit, which is a sentence I both did and didn’t enjoy saying, and it may have been presented to the EU because the British are known for their sense of humour. I mean, for them to sign off of at a special summit at the end of November. Bear in mind that this is just the first little bit. The first teeny tiny bit of a shit ton of other things that need to happen for the UK to function post Brexit such as trade deals, implementing laws, immigration laws and you know, whether to publicly hang, burn or set fire to anyone who is bilingual. Sorry, I mean, er…oh god. So forgetting that all that could be terrible and no one’s planned anything for it and ignoring, for a second that everyone ever dislikes all May’s proposed plans so far because they’re either too far, not far enough or let’s face it, just shit, or that Labour still don’t know what they want like the Chidi Anagonya’s of politics. Ignoring all that, here’s where we are right now:

1. Cabinet are currently having a crunch meeting. Sadly that’s not when they discuss which are the best crisps, or maybe not sadly as that’d take ages and then there’d be no time for Brexit chat unless they mainly talked about how great Taytos are and how post Brexit they’ll be harder to get except not really because they make them in Northern Ireland too. What it does mean is they’re trying to come to an agreement on the strategy and plan. Also on how to sell the plan once they’ve come up with it which according to the leaked notes from Whitehall involve May telling Brexiteers that if they don’t support it they’ll be responsible for a no deal and telling remainers she sought for the closest possible deal but that Britain won’t be part of the UK forever. Basically playing both sides like a goddamn hustler. We’ve all seen those US teen movies. She’ll be found out and everyone will team up and humiliate her at the school prom by pouring punch over her dress. You’ll see May, you’ll see. Part of the leaked plan also suggested that she wouldn’t admit to ditching the Chequers plan but would signal privately that should would allow a pivot towards a different landing zone. Which is a great metaphor unless the Brexit she’s worked out doesn’t allow planes to land.
2. The big part of these talks is of course the Irish border and the backstop because Brexit bods like Dominic ‘if we live on an island how come there’s no palm trees’ Raab want to be able to end a backstop so it doesn’t become permanent as if a Conservative government isn’t a permanent stop backwards anyway and legal bods say you probably can’t do that and oh god why is this still happening why oh why? Then of course the DUP don’t want a border in the sea because gods hates shrimp, probably. Ireland and the EU will only accept a backstop that everybody likes, and by everybody they probably mean all main countries as I don’t think they give a fuck what Dominic Raab thinks when he’s still amazed that sometimes the sky changes colour. But Raab along with attorney general Geoffrey Cox are expected to write a draft backstop with mutual way to end it included. But then Raab was also expected to know how basic geography works so who the fuck knows what will happen. Michael Gove has asked if he can see the legal advice that will go with the backstop draft so ministers can be covered if going along with it because there’s nothing like showing a former journalist and now environment minister legal advice for reassurance.
3. And of course the EU still want a backstop to the backstop which the DUP don’t want because then they’d still be part of the customs union and have to share things and be nice. But all this has to be agreed by the cabinet, published, signed off at an EU summit in late November then presented to MPs in December where they might all tell May to go do one hard and then we’ll only have three months for her to sort it all out again. Will she manage it? Will anyone actually do anything? Will Dominic Raab ever leave his home again or will he be too scared that if he does, he might fall into the sea? Who knows but what is for certain is that lots of people who don’t have a clue will keep saying stupid things out loud as if to show the world that we’ll have prime export in idiots if they fancy hiring anyone that will make their biggest twat look smart.

First up is split end and somehow former Brexit Secretary David Davis because it seems to get that role you really have to barely function as a human. He said that a Brexit no deal will cause some hiccups and bumps in the road but it’s nothing to worry about. If you compare that to him back in February when he said it won’t be like Mad Max, that means it’s somewhere between dystopian nightmare and an involuntary reflex. I mean to name but a few things that have already happened, people are stockpiling food and medicines, Manston Airport in Kent is being kept open incase its needed as an addition lorry park for customs delays, and British Airways is going to become a Spanish company which worries me as they may try and open a sports bar then go bankrupt. So either Davis has not seen Mad Max or his hiccups are hugely violent and he should be really, really terrified by them.

We’ve heard Raab’s special moment already so now let’s head to…

LIAM FOX JINGLE

Disgraced MP Liam The Disgrace Fox has said that the UK must have the power on its own to end any backstop customs accord with the EU. HOW DO YOU NOT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT A BACKSTOP IS? HOW CAN YOU STOP SOMETHING IF YOU HAVEN’T PUT IN PLACE THE THINGS ITS THERE TO PROTECT YOU FROM? GET IN THE SEA FOX, GO BUILD A BORDER USING JEREMY WRIGHT’S LEGO AND GET IN THE FUCKING SEA.

Ah that’s better. As I’m recording this May has said that negotiations are now in the endgame, so who knows what things will be like next week. Let’s hope that endgame isn’t Risk, Scrabble or Trivial Pursuit. Either way its likely something will come out of it, even if it’s just that Dominic Raab has been admitted to A&E because he’s got a game piece lodged up his nose.

And now back to Georg….

INTERVIEW WITH GEORG PART 2

Thank you to Georg for that excellent chat. Georg is on twitter @gloefflmann though he doesn’t seem to use it too much. Best to instead check out his page on the Warwick university site which is easily google-able and I’ve popped it in the podcast bio too, and on that page is a link to his current research study on populism in the US and Europe called The Enemy Inside The Gates. Vox, which Georg mentions is always worth checking out and often has some of the very best explanatory videos for current issues that explain things clearly to idiots like me, so I’m a big fan. The others Georg mentioned The New York Times and Washington Post are great but have paywalls so watch out for that if you don’t already subscribe. And I’d also suggest for all US politics stuff checking out Pod Save America, Abe Lincoln’s Top Hat, and of course Last Week Tonight on Sky Atlantic or HBO if you can get those. Or you know, loads of other things because America is great for actually good political tv shows, satire, comedy and podcasts and I am regularly jealous. And no, don’t you dare tell me the three things the UK has and how they are as good, no they’re not, they’re all bad except maybe Blindboy’s new one which is very worth a watch. What’s that? No, I’m not jealous that I’m not involved in any. I’ve been invited to work on another show. No, you wouldn’t have heard of it. No, its on a channel you won’t have seen. Ahem. Anyway.

Don’t forget if you have someone you’d like to recommend I interview or a subject you think I should find someone to interview about, please let me know and you can do that by getting in touch @parpolbro on Twitter, the Partly Political Broadcast group on Facebook, the contact page on partlypoliticalbroadcast.co.uk or email me at partlypoliticalbroadcast@gmail.com. Or have it engraved into your head like the ancient Egyptian method of scalp tattoos then let all your hair grow back and turn up at my flat demanding I shave your head to receive the message, at which point I’ll send you to the barber down the road who’s actually really good and he’ll spend so long talking to you about Turkish football teams you’ll doze off and forget your main task. As ever, it’s probably best to email.

END

And that’s all for this week’s Partly Political Broadcast podcast. Thank you once again for choosing to have one hour less of the allocated listening you get in your life because of this show. What do you mean you didn’t know you had finite listens? Yep true story. That’s why old people don’t pay attention to all of us pleading for them to vote nicer. Fact. It’s just too late for them, they spent way to long listening to the war or bards or something. Please review, donate and generally sing about this show as you skip around the merry sunlit lands where you live so that others may know the delirious joy you’re experiencing. Or you know, just tell people you think this is alright and better than hitting your eye with a spoon so why not give it a go.

Thank you once again to Acast for tending to this show in its sound hospice, to my brother The Last Skeptik for his music plinking and plonking and to Kay Day for typing up the linear notes as per all the time.

This will be back next week when Dominic Raab exclaims excitedly that he’s made friends with the man in the mirror but doesn’t know how he always knows what he’s going to wear.

BYEEEEEEEEEEEE

This week’s show was brought to you by Remember Dis Day wear, for when you don’t have the right coat to honour the dead. Shake off that anorak and swap it for one of our codpiece poppys and nothing else to show that you still rise for the fallen. Eschew a suit and tie and why not dress as a truck with a giant poppy attached to the grill? No one will say you unlested forgetteded when you show up in that 75ft long haul costume, with large poppy attachment and horn that plays Europop versions of Wilfred Owen poems. Remember Dis, for all your most respectful attire for the club or the cenotaph.

CLIP OF ME SPEAKING TOO FAST

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